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RA over Nx^

sup this is botch styleZ writeup of Nx vs RA in TFL action LOL. THE GOGGLES, THEY DO NOTHING

Tonight we had a SUPER intense matchup against Nx and their pal, WiKiD.

Round 1

So anyway, round one i had to eat with my girlfiend and her family at the fish fry, so i didnt get to play or anything. The entire time i was just staring at her gradmother eating hush puppies and catfish and shit, and i was just like CHRIST WOMAN WILL YOU HURRY THE FUCK UP BEFORE I JAB YOU IN THE FACE WITH THIS SPOON??? But yeah, I'm sitting there eating while the match goes on. I actually thought i could make it home at around 7:55 EST to be there if needed for r1, but it turns out the family trip to walmart was needed after our beloved meal at the fish fry. So like, we head over to wally world and i walk around silently weeping to myself as I think of my clan getting anally devastated in my absence. What is server? :D Wh, we have a match..? :F Gaw guys...what class to i play :(((( GOD WHERE IS BOTCH So yeah. Round one I heard we couldn't warmup because our server is down and stuff. Then sejje's mother did a bellyflop off of her bed and crushed sejje's neck, rendering him unconscious at his computer. Sejje is gone, and people are frantically putting together a lineup or something. I guess they did decently because I came back after my walmart adventures and they were like SUP WE TIED FOUR TO FOUR. Then like, people were all talking bad about sejje and his mop haircut. He's pretty decent at tfc, but he's about as reliable as phantom's shotgun aim (SUP CLANG CLANG). But yea...RA faired decently r1 and delayed long enough so their FEARLESS LDR WITH THE IRON FIST could join and win tfc in round two. Oh, I also took a poop right after I came home :) :) k3k3.

Round 2

Round two was on the same server I think.....AGT's server, which is awesome. I ping like -7 to the server. kl was gracious enough to sit for me because he was busy trying to evade his bans in europe and all CS servers. Offense was myself, the TFC medic master...paragon, who was busy hitting on asians and coding new secret spy technology for the government and Alec Baldwin...anguish, who played despite the switch being layed across his back at regular intervals by his mother (its really hard to conc with tears in your eyes isnt it :/)....and kawwsome, our newly acquired member who lives in the same town as para THERE MUST BE SOMETHING IN THE WATER LOL. Actually, to be honest, I think kaww is actually just paragon playing on a second computer using his feet. He like, decided TFC with just one computer was too easy, so he decided to build another comp and give it a go like that one kid with no arms who played tfc with just his feet :(...except he used his hands and stuff. What proof do I have? 1. kaww blows. 2. kaww cannot bhop, since bhopping using your feet is sort of hard. 3. kaww and para live in the same town. 4. Both kaww and para keep online journals of their most deep thoughts and plans to blow up the CPL using a series of pipeboms and plastic explosives strapped to their chests (<3). Okay..yeah so round two. I was really cold at the start of this round and I missed like ten concs before I could even use my voice comms button or my mouse. This round was one sided for the first half. RA was able to pull out flags like me when im with anguish's mother. We were keeping pressure pretty decently until duque decided to build a small, metal object at the top of the metal platform that rises to keep it from letting the force of gravity act upon it (9.8 m/s^2). So like, we were winning 2-0 and i was pretty psyched because I could catch the last half of this show im watching....then troj decides to toggle off roaster john and Nx starts pulling caps. Luckily we were able to cap a few more, so this round ends 3-3 I believe. We go into IRC, where I have everyone deopped and have the channel moderated to keep my iron fist ruling at a maximum. I am also simultaneously stealing ownership of channels from six separate people and locking the topic in all channels I have ownership in. We had to go and do overtime against Nx and everyone was basically losing sphincter control. Slimr pm's me and is like hey can we use wikid, so im like no because I thought he was still in PF. Then slimr is like YOU AGREED, and it finally clicked that wikid had joined another clan or something. So influx had to leave because we delayed so much or whatever, so he's in...we head into OT

OT

We played OT on that same server run in my basement, and everyone is really excited. About this time, the fish fry stuff is catching up to me and I start to have to poop, but I decide to hold it for Team RA. Round starts and I miss my obligatory 3 concs and decide to get the lasers as everyone else frantically waits in flagroom, only for freakle to mow them down in 2.2 seconds...this round was seriously about 3 or 4 minutes long. Nx got the first touch and a bit of movement, while anguish pulled a crap move out of his ass (I saw the demo, trust me), and threw one on the floor in the FR. Nx was pulling our flag VERY quickly, and I was almost certain we would lose. Then anguish has 2 runs in a row where he throws the flag near plank, then he ran the flag out via plank. At this point our flag was bottom ramp, and Nx's flag was front door. Nx grabbed the flag as i came down ramp, and I killed tupac-lover and slimrr with a gren to save ours at FD. Both flags are at FD, and para or someome gets the conc off and throws it in our yard. Qu, who was in XD and has sinc quit that gay guid for VD (which will probably soon disband), grabbed the flag and pulled his patented Two Foot Rocket Jump (c) and proceeded to throw the flag to me. I grab it...and realize i have no concs, so I throw it to SuperJew, who gren jumps it up. Round ends with our flag at FD. We got very lucky to pull ours out so fast. THX COBRAS :D

Afterwards our chan was filled with spam and stuff...go cats.

A few things before I go:

Shocker has decided to not do drugs anymore...he's only gonna do shrooms. NOT DRUGS, SHROOMS (wtf.)
Qu always talks about how he is an RJ master...he talks about all these rjs he can do, then when he grabs a flag in the yard, he cant pull of a fucking five foot rj to cap. Seriously, you're fucking terrible.
Sejje is probably 12. or 11 maybe.
Para is a tfc jedi master and will 1v1 everyone at CPL. If he loses, he dets pipebomb and plastic explosives.
Jugg still idles in our channel because he gives me SA access and gives me comp advice when I need it. Also he weighs a metric tonne.
Phantom is possibly the most whiny person in tfc. EVERYONE PM THIS GUY AND SAY e9 FUCKING BLOWS KIDDO. He will proceed to have a nervous breakdown and wont even be able to clang his gun to achieve victory.
xero is a super duper loser with a needle penis who talks about having guests that prevent him from playing round 2. In this case guests means buying a new jaguar because I have billions and I wipe my ass with hundred d s abollar bills. Also my penis is small and my girlfriend is ugly
kl is still angry at me for stealing ownership. SOrry d00d. Maybe if you wouldnt be banned everywhere except in NA TFC, i'd think about giving it back. Wait...no. LWLZL
Troj doenst play TFC anymore, I'm pretty sure. [Troj]: CS GUYS???????????????????....that's all I see. Ever. Without relent.(relentlessly lol!)
cre is either shocker under another name (beause of his stoner voice), or he is a superb faggot because he wears earrings and never sees the light of day.
ShocK can only bench like 250.....I bench 675. That's what you get for using whey proteins idiot. Eat six chocolate cakes a day like I do and I'll get back to you.

Finally: I paint in 90 degree weather for minimum wage. paragon naps in a cubicle and codes equations for hollow-tip intercontinental missiles in HTML and makes about 36 dollars an hour. The time he spends napping as his job is about....3 hours a week. In those 3 hours, he makes more than I do in an entire week. Thanks :D!

K bye

-botch

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