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NeX over BD

Ok.... This is going to be the longest writeup ever. I am having a competition against KARNAGE from M. To see who can writeup the longest writeup. He is dead. It has to be an actual writeup. But my writeups are crazy. A COMPETITION OVER AN ONLINE INTERNET GAME MATCH WRITEUP. I NEVER LOSE. Its a school night, I have the time. Okkk. Lets start with.

WOOOOOOOOO PATRIOTSSSSSSSSSSSSS, SUP RAPEDDDDD CAROLINAAAAAAAAAAA HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA.

That counts as being a writeup, because my writeups are weird, and include my life. To keep it interesting, even though my life sucks, but pez's is worse, only reason im alive, because i make fun of pez, becuase i have a better life then pez. OHH YEA, THE BEST DEFENSIVE ENGY IN TFC, Pez, Is now the worst. (Refer to round2). OHH YEA, I HAD A HOCKEY GAME DURING THE END OF THE SUPERBOWL.... HMMMM 4th YEAR IN A ROW. OVERTIME FIELDGOAL 2 YEARS AGO, NOPE, MISSED IT. SUPERBOWL LAST YEAR, DIDNT CARE. THIS YEAR, OK, MISS IT AGAIn. Im suprised i didnt turn on sportcenter and hear "BEST SUPERBOWL IN HISTORY, EVERYTHING HAPPENED AT THE END". But yea, IT DID, like 928349823984 tds. Ohh yea. Also to mention our member CORKY, who went to the superbowl last year. He was on irc, and is like. Uhh yea, my dad just said we are going to the superbowl tomorrow. Im like yea, whatever. I wake up, we call him. Yea.... im at the airport going to the superbowl. hahah HE IS INSANE, CRAZY MAN, YOU'RE CRAZY MAN. Kayyyyyyyyyyyy. So yea, superbowl party yesterday, WOOOOOO. ONLY PATRIOT FAN THERE, WITH LIKE 20 KIDS. SO YEA. they were lucky i wasnt there at end of game. AHAHAHA PUSSIES. BITCH BITCH BITCH. My prediction was Green Bay vs. New England. BUTTTTT NOOOOOOO, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, 4th and 26, RAPED BY DONOVAN (my name). So yea, thats why i cheered for the pats, because they are my prediction to win it all, obviously. They coulda easily won by sooo much more. Just wanted to keep the game close, and not make it like last year. ALSO, the awesome ALIEN COMMERCIAL. "We know you are an alien" "We should use Fedex" HAHAHAHHA WOWOOOOOO. And the monkey on the guys back, when he grabs the paper and shakes it, hahashahhaha (hence my name chimp) WOOOO. ALSO THE STREAKER, HAHAHAH, He was dressed like a ref and was dancing. I remember seeing the far view, and i actually said "Why did the kicker bring out a towel" because i remember them doing it with snow, on fieldgoals. But this is a kickoff in an arena, so i thought like one of the players would trip on it. But then, noticed a guy dancing, and that was his clothers. So the cameras focus on a patriots players face whose is normal with no reaction. I also heard the streaker got raped by a linebacker, OBVIOUSLY TERRY TATE. OHH YEA< WTF I DIDNT SEE NO TERRY TATE COMMERCIAL, GOOD GOD. AND THE NIPPLE, AHHAHA SOOO STAGED. That was a little weird. So this relates to my writeup. because we couldnt practice because of the superbowl. SUP RAPED KARNAGE.

Ok, So i wake up in the morning, I go to school. And while im at school, im writing tfc strats in my binder. NOT IM NOT AF UCKIGN NERD LIKE PEZ. So yea, i get home at 8est. Im like... hmmm i think i should look at the map. I go in.... ITS FUCKING WEIRD. Someone (NOT FRAGILE) told me it was exactly like sd2 with stuff taken out so yea. I need to learn the map. I remember seeing it in like avis and stuff but yea. Its a weird map. Soooo we go in to practice. Once again, takes 5 hours before everyone is in. So we dont start practice until 3 and a half hours after our match was supposed to start. We practice the map, me engy, sun soly, enough soly, frag hw.. We had slow, corky, pez, and mass on Offense. Also. When we started the practice. We were running 8v4. 8 O vs our 4 D to see how much we raped. Yea we held them for like 5 minutes. It was insane. We practice, and i decide to actually look in irc. To get info. I alt tab out, read the info. Ask to play in their server, because i ping like 200 to our server and dont have hltv. Sooo they allowed us to play in their server. Im still looking for an hltv for our server soo yea. We make lineups, same as listed above, wait, gotta make this writeup long. me engy, sun soly, enough soly, frag hw.. We had slow, corky, pez, and mass on Offense. Ok. We go in server... make our strat, explain positions. And learn the map. So yea. Frag came right before match to play hw, thank god. He did good, which isnt hard standing on a grenade bag. We go in. Takes awhile to get all 8, because pez likes men, and had to finish his phone call with Enough. EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE IN THE SAME CLAN, THEY STILL CALL EACH OTHER TO TALK ABOUT GAY STUFF. Pez is always like, WHATS ENOUGHS PHONE NUMBER? WHATS ENOUGHS PHONE NUMBER? WHATS ENOUGHS PHONE NUMBER? He likes men, enough is fat. So we get in, and they comment about us disputing against them because they werent getting 8 in. Sooo yea, we dont start until like 10est. Like always, no one starts early, unless you are weird. We go in, i HATE small respawns. I feel claushtrophobic (lol) or something from LOOKING AT A MONITOR, WOW. But yea, its boring, no running around, just stuck in a 5x5 room, with 9 other guys in the room (With 2 who actually like men). AND sunshine. Sooo, to make it exciting, We all go demo and spam nonstop mirvs too lag people. So yea, we do. It was insane, sooo laggy. And you see pez typing "BITCH, LOOK AT MY PING" with his 900 ping on his 56k lol. Then one of their players drop, lol we thought we did that, but it was funny, we didnt. OKKK, so yea, I win the tk race at like 105 or something, but we didnt start tking till 2 mins left in pm. K, back from peeing. I bet when i try to submit this, it will say "LIMIT 2000 WORDS" or soemthing. ALso, during PM, freaking mevo came in, and was typing everything in mm1 because he like doesnt have mm2 bound. Freaking AG told him to go in. We had our members watching in their 2 slot hltv, lol. OK, WOW. THE ROUND STARTS. I click my left mouse button. I press my keypad 8, get armor, and bags. I respawned by the button room, press my keypad 4 and turn my mouse left, go in the room, and press page down, my bind for my sg, SG IS BEING BUILT, I build sg, do a 180 degree turn with my mouse, press my keypad 8 button and run to get bags, i run back to sg press #1 and press left mouse button to hit sg. OK, IM NOT GOING TO TYPE LIKE THAT WHOLE ROUND, I WOULD IF I REALLY CARED, DO I CARE, NOPE. K, We hold them from capping a long time. Frag is spamming that little T thing, and killing everyone. With his amazing incommings, ours soldieers wallhack people. Sunshine did amazing, killing everyone, but now to enough, he is a little douche bag. He was doing horrible and sucks. And to our offense, they YOU KNOW WHAT, LETS GO BACK TO ENOUGH. I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HIm. Yea, he is a little faggot. This little guy is horrible. When you think he is good, he is a douche bag. Letting everyone by. When fragile makes an incoming, INCOMING TOP. [BD]EnoughisFAT /^ [NeX]Enough HE GETS CROWBARRED. HAHAHAHHA, THEN HE IS LIKE. WTF FRAGILE, GIVE ME INCOMMINGS. SO YEA. I GO IN RR, AND SCREAM INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP INCOMING TOP . AGAIN, he gets owned. WTF I SUCK AND I LIKE MEN AND I WEIGH 800 POUNDS, thats all you hear over the mic. Also i kicked out force because he is gay and likes men too. He whines too much and was trying to multiclan. So yea. Me abyss and force have not lost a 3v3. We've played like 20, but yea. We are good. On 2fort, Me = Worst D Soldier in TFC, so yea, if i somehow hit one of their O with a nadeout of respawn, i make incomings. One time i was like "incoming spiral, crowbar him" he whips its out, ohh yea, he whips it out and SMACK, one hit crowbar kill on -V-Brick. And then we win 389249832598 - 0. Ohh yea. ABYSS didnt play today. BECAUSE HE FELL ASLEEP. hahahah. Sounds like things i did while in dynamite. So yea, we were missing our best offensive player and the match was not as fun. But fragile showed, so it made it fun. Ok. So back to round 1. We cap the flag, FINALLY. Corky got the security, and mass gets the flag. Our other 2 O just went afk. We got a couple caps and i found out that mass is actually a good offensive player since he was doing all the work. Our defense was doing amazing, Enough being a douche bag, Sunshine shining it up, Fragile keeping packages from being thrown in mailtrucks, and chimp raping enough with his emps. So yea, we held. I was getting bored, holding them from getting button, So i run O. I build a teleport, and just build randomly in their base. I helped get a couple flags out. I even built one at their button lol. SO yea, it kept getting destroyed though, slow was also an O engy so yea. When i was O, i got security, and hear enough go, YOUR SG IS DOWN, GET BACK, NOOO THEY ARE GETTING THE FLAG. See what happens when i go offense, enough cant do anything without me. So yea, im stitting in there base trying to die, takes forever. Once i finally die, they already like have our flag, because enough sucks. So thats the cap they got round 1. WIth all our screaming over the mic it was fun, enough is a douche bag. At the end of the round, pez was trying to knife me but his aimbot like hit one of the medics running by so it looked funny. Round ends, 30-10 NeX > BD. The players scores were: Fragile 55 31, me 43 21, douche bag 33 10, massari 32 40, slow 22 43, sun 21 19, pezlikesmen 9 37, corky 9 44. The BD scores: money 48 25, cobalt 36 23, bonez 25 11, rorippa 19 33, trance 18 46, fragfire 17 48, mexi 16 46 (SUP RAPED VIKINGS), KC pistol 3 41.

Ok, ROUND 2. Wow im getting kind of tired. Ok, we switch lineups. PEZ IS NOW OUR D ENGY, From before, this will show you how he is horrible. I go offense because i want to and im the leader, so ya. LOL. Anyways, we are missing ABYSS< WHERE ARE YOU ABYYSSS, JEEZZZZZZZ. Everything else is the same. THIS TIME, WE START THE TK RACE RIGHT AWAY. But i was afk peeing/getting water for more pee/food. So yea, corky wins the race. We race, and get to 200 just before prematch ends, freeking team wouldnt respawn, so it was just me and corky killing each other. So . he wins, we got like 210 tks yea... Round starts, scout rush. We all get owned. Pez gets owned, he gets caltrop killed 7 times in a row. And they get our security and flag like 20 times, because pez sucks sooo bad. OUR BNEST D ENGY IS NOW HORRIBLE, WHAT HAPPENED? Ohh yea, pez was never good. So yea, i think he maybe got 2 sgs up the whole round. ALl i hear over the mic is PEZ GET A FUCKING SG Up, PEZ GET AN SG UP, PEZ YOU LIKE MEN, PEZ HAVE MY BABYS, PEZ SG, NOW, PEZ SG SG SG SG, PEZ GO IN SECURITY, PEZ STOP SHOOTTING ME, THATS ME NOT A SPY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITHT HOSE EMPS, PEZ STOP BLOCKING THE RESPAWN WAY, WTF PEZ WHY DOES YOUR TELEPORT LEAD TO THE YARD, PEZ WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU ARE DEFENSE, PEZ DUDE YOU BLOW, HOLY CRAP PEZ YOU ARE HORRIBLE, WOW PEZ I LOVE YOU - enough, PEZ YOU LIKE MEN, BIG FAT MEN (enough), PEZ OUR FLAG IS IN THE FLAGROOM. from pez "i like men, wheres our flag x3929359' thats all he said over the mic. He also typed. "imm lagingg" YEA RIGHT, JUST TRYING TO MAKE EXCUSES. SO BAD TO OFFENSE, we get the seccwait i can stop thinkinga bout this douche bag pez. He is horrible, while our other Defense sunshine and chubby are doing good, wait just sunshine, he is doing horrible and lettin out caps. And enough is afk eating lard. While fragile is saving glass packages with his nonstop mirvs at the rr entrance. Fragile was like that one avi when the medics who obviously were staged to 2 hp run in 4 in a row and all die, that was fragile the whole round. The only time they got by was when they went bottom and pez tked sunshine and blew himself up, and they got by horrible chubby soldier (enough) to get security, then pez spawns, tks fragile. They get flag, pez stops, takes 3 minutes to type "wheres our flag". And they have already capped 5 times. So yea, pez was horrible. During all this, enough was getting so pissed that he made b3w go defense and he went O. When he went O, we didnt cap again. So yea, b3w did ok, but hard with pezs emps and his sg shooting you. so yea, they capped a lot this round, ALL BECAUSE OF OUR WORST ENGY IN TFC. SOoo yea, now for our offense. We did good. me corky and mass raping it. I kept getting security. Killing a lot of people and getting button. They noticed that having a demo is sorta useless when like 5 medics are coming so yea. I tought my players the tactic "relay" so yea. It was sorta insane relays. Like one time, we had just gotten the flag out, and we had 3 medics waiting for relay lol. So we capped a lot. I actually teach my palyers the map, im the most amazing leader in tfc. People love me. I was convinced to remake this clan, because EVERYONE loves it. Ohh yea, recruiting one engy, come by #nexclan to tryout. We are making pez our clan bitch now. If we need a map download link, he will fetch it. If we need a server ip and pw for match, he will get it. If our server needs to be set up, he will do it. SO anyways... Our O did good. Corky did ok, he always gets pissed when people take his flags, so yea, he screamed a lot when b3w tked him and then capped, lol. Also, i kept getting flag, and throwing it outside, so mass and corky were fighting all the way to cap for flag, sorta funny. Also their freeking O soldier (TRANCE) kept going D when flag was in RR, and shooting me when im in their base so yea, I was tryting to suicide him. and yea, i infected him when walking out, crap like that. REMEMBER 4 D max, sooo yea.... that 5th D coulda got us a dispute win. But yea.. Round ends 80-60 NeX > BD. The player scores were ahhh who cares.

VGG BD, Everyone had fun. Ive never seen so much mm1s with "lols and rofls". We had so many crowbar fights and stuff, was very fun and clean.

-[NeX]chimp
#nexclan

PEZ LIKES MEN

WRITEUP OVER, YEA RIGHT.
Karnage, you are getting D STROYEDDDDD.

<[NeX]CoRkY> ok so there i was wiht no good players around me all by myself 1 on 4....i had to play to my top lvl which i did...i am a team player i had to keep giving caps to my teamate so they dont get kicked out of clan and kill themselves..thast how 1337 i am
<[NeX]CoRkY> they couldnt stop me or touch me i was like michael jackson at a 8 year olds b-day i was michael jackson
<[NeX]CoRkY> w0000000000000
<[NeX]CoRkY> i own so bad
<[NeX]CoRkY> .....thats my write up

<[NeX]Enough> "when im on D we let no caps out...when i'm on O we score alot but we let alot of caps out...we just need to clone me so we can dominate on O and D"
<[NeX]Enough> "corky is a dirty jew"
<[NeX]Enough> -RaciestDrunk

<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> i spammed... and um... i spammed some more... pez... *sigh* pez ur supposed to build sg when ur ng...
<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> i spammed... and um... i spammed some more... pez... *sigh* pez ur supposed to build sg when ur ng... i spammed... some more... our defense kinda all over the place round2.. but anyway. i just got here from orchestra practice and i ended up playing. how cool is that? abyss didnt play. that alone ruined the match. though we won, it wasnt that fun of a match. not too many funny things happened.
<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> enough bitches a lot....
<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> sunny seldomly speaks... she needs to speak more!
<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> corky sang.. what else is new
<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> pez likes men
<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> b3w is a negative a hole who doesnt like tfc
<[NeX]WallBanger^uL> slowbleed... u suck at offense! TEE HEE
though my strat was lame, it worked nicely. Enough bitched about me not calling incomings to the top, when in fact, i called like almost everysingle one. i called the top 'T' because chimp told me to. i guess enough didnt know that. its ok tho because hes an elite solly
jrod wasnt here, yet he still managed to own.. i dont know how..
i didnt even know about the elevator until half-way into rnd 1 (this is my first time on this map)
THE END

<[NeX]slowbleed|sD-[det]> PEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
<[NeX]slowbleed|sD-[det]> NEX PWNAGE
<[NeX]slowbleed|sD-[det]> SHIT UPDATE

<[8-Jebus[married-to-DK]> IM SEXY AND I WANT SEX 4 MONEY
<[8-Jebus[married-to-DK]> well the match was very wild cause chimp was whoring the mic like the lil slut he is..but the other team offense was very good and skilled , it took us some time to adjust

<M|KarNagE`zD> OHG, I just wrote the longest writeup in history
<M|KarNagE`zD> In history.

^^^ YOU WISH, I HAD TO SCROLL UP TO READ THAT. You have to type 83259394858 wpm or copied pasted a whole lot to beat me.

<[NeX]chimp> LISTEN
<[NeX]chimp> k
<[NeX]chimp> you build in button room
<[NeX]chimp> where i was building
<[NeX]chimp> switch sides
<pez|away> k
<[NeX]chimp> k?
<pez|away> k
<pez|away> k
<pez|away> k
<[NeX]chimp> build dispenser on button
<[NeX]chimp> enough will tell you when to det
<[NeX]chimp> if securituy is down
<[NeX]chimp> build ON the flag
<[NeX]chimp> facing doors
<[NeX]chimp> if they keep getting security
<[NeX]chimp> just leave it in fr
<[NeX]chimp> if its in rr
<[NeX]chimp> build in RR
<pez|away> k
<[NeX]chimp> build on top ramps
<[NeX]chimp> if they cap 2
<[NeX]chimp> im coming D
<pez|away> k
<[NeX]chimp> so you go O
<pez|away> lol
<[NeX]chimp> remind me
<[NeX]chimp> like scream
<[NeX]chimp> saying THEY GOT 2 CAPS
<[NeX]chimp> because i wont notice
<pez|away> k
<pez|away> CHIMP
<pez|away> when i get my sg up
<pez|away> ima go play in the yard
<[NeX]chimp> go ahead
<[NeX]chimp> but if enough needs you
<[NeX]chimp> go back
<pez|away> WOOOOOOOOOOOO
<[NeX]chimp> thats how they cappec
<[NeX]chimp> i was running O
<[NeX]chimp> lol
<pez|away> k
<pez|away> im going in

<[NeX]Massari> K
<[NeX]Massari> can i pm him?
<[NeX]Massari> fuck ok

<Nev|out-bbin20> do we have enough for match?
<[NeX]chimp> yea
<[NeX]Never> k. cool. sorry i missed prac. had to run to store :-/
<[NeX]Never> imma HLTV then. heh

<[SMP]Ripzone-Ai-> writeup: I'm suprised NeX could win a match the are the suckest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.

<[BD]b0n3z`gone> downloading logs now
<[BD]b0n3z`gone> sorry about the wait
<[BD]b0n3z`gone> congratulations man
<[BD]b0n3z`gone> you made it in if you want
<[BD]b0n3z`gone> errr wrong person
<[BD]b0n3z`gone> lol

<[NeX]Abyss^cool> for writeup uh
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> It all started with me capping like every run
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> I had like 10 homeruns
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> we won r1 like 500-0
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> But then I woke up and realize I missed match
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> wait
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> don't put that
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> lemme write a longer story
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> lol
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> OK WE START OFF PRAC AND EVERYTHING IS GOING PERFECT
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> WE SEEM TO HAVE THE BEST D STRAT POSSIBLE
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> So r1 we all pile into server and BD was all talkin shit and stuff
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> and we stayed cool and didn't mm1
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> And then match starts and D holds strong, shuts them out
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> I ran back like 20 homeruns in a row and round finishes like 340-0
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> So we go back to IRC and we're laughing about how they're eating their words now
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> And then we go into server r2 and we all play with the mouse in our opposite hands
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> and we still dominate them 110-0
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> So we're back in IRC again and they say they're gonna dispute for hacks and stuff
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> and then corky like curses them off and we were like YEAH GET THE FUCK OUTA HERE NEWBIES
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> And then we're all talkin about how NeX is goin Platinum
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> But then I woke up and realized I missed match
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> :/
<[NeX]Abyss^cool> gg sleep

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OHH yea, i love coming out of matches with a netsplit, so its impossible to talk about match our even say GG to the clan. But yea, NOT JUST IRC LOGS. READ THIS BITCH.

And, heres Abysisisss's writeup of his tfc life:

There are some very important events in my TFC career that led up to this match. It all started somewhere around three years ago. One day in AutoCAD class my friends Bob and Ian were telling me about an amazing modification for Half-Life that they had been playing for some time. They described in vivid detail things like conc jumping, strategies for defense, and some new maps that were being released. This game was one I knew I couldn?t pass up. I bought Half-Life three days later and couldn?t wait to get TFC. I had purchased the box set of Half-Life with TFC and CS included on their own disks and didn?t find out until later that TFC could have been downloaded for FREE. I installed HL but it said it was not updated to play online. I talked to my friend and he linked me to FilePlanet so I could download the update. I was on 56k at the time so I left my computer on for about two days to finish and then installed. When I had everything updated I went on and began playing but I found it was nothing like what my friend told me! There were no concs, no classes? NOTHING SPECIAL AT ALL! But I soon found out I was playing HLDM, not TFC! So after much confusion I finally got to play TFC. I followed the directions my friend gave me for concing and had a knack for it immediately. I was doing hand-held concs on 56k by my third day almost perfectly. That night I was playing Epicenter on a pub and some people were recruiting a guy from the server. I asked them about how I could join and they said they?d take me in as a recruit. MY FIRST CLAN, HOW EXCITING! The clan was called, Soul Reavers, and I decided on the name sR.Beast. I gained skill in TFC rather quickly with the preference of the medic class. We never joined leagues but we had regular scrimmages against clans -=CR=- and Aa|. A few months into sR. a kid who would become one of my better friends on the internet joined, WongFeiHung. We were an unstoppable offensive force. We designed plays and picked up tricks. Our first important scrim against -=CR=- came on the first custom map I?d ever play, Openfire_l. We practiced for two days before the scrimmage and Wong and I learned tricks like spy feigning inside the lasers when they went up for relay and concing up the ramp from water to flag. During the scrim I had my first taste of leetness. Upon dropping a conc at the bottom of the ramp, I primed a nade. When I was propelled into the air I spotted an SG behind the left post. I fired some random nails and threw the nade. It took out the SG, the NG, the demo, and a soldier and I took flag out of base. This was the first extremely exciting moment in my TFC career. Me and Wong got better and better as a team, almost to the point where we were telepathically linked with each other. We designed plays on maps like Well and Openfire_l and ended up growing too good for non-league play. My friend Ian was a soldier for clan [CS] and gave us invited to try out, but didn?t promise that they?d be able to take us both. So we decided to look elsewhere. We joined our first 5v5 clan and totally raped OGL. Soon Wong got tied up with life obligations and I had to play a one-man offense for the first round of most of our matches. This clan soon grew tiring and we quit it as well. I joined the clan !HF! a few days later and played offense for them. When we disbanded, I took my first break from TFC for two months. I talked to my friends in school about the game and they suggested a 9v9 team. I returned to TFC and tried out for Aa| but I was told I wasn?t quick enough. I then tried out for clan [Rabid] and they said they saw some talent in me. I soon picked up a knack for the Spy class, practicing my knifing and such. I can remember a match we had on RedGiant in which I played spy. We went into overtime and I got the winning cap by jumping onto the demo?s head, stabbing him, grabbing flag, using my teammates conc, and then capping the flag. Soon Wong told me about a clan he was joining with some friends called [vL] and asked me to tryout. We played a 2o vs. 3d match for tryout on Monkey_l. Our psychic med abilities helped me get into the clan with ease. I met a lot of people who I?d play with again in the future in this clan: Nightwish, b3w, biohaz, Traqz, CrackBrain, Faze, KayPee, Jymox, DominatioN, and Hybrix (azul). We were an amazing team; we beat GoW in a scrimmage when they were a decent team, and always started off our matches strong. But we never pulled off a win, which was rather upsetting and caused us to disband quickly. I returned to [Rabid] after this and we took the TFL 3a Title on Scrummage against Vendetta. Soon I had some arguments with my clanmates and decided to leave. I whored a few clans like 3eer and some I can?t remember the names of. I once again returned to Rabid but when Merc^X rejoined we didn?t get along and I left for the third time. I was looking for an up-and-coming clan to join and noticed a clan that was raping, even if it WAS in 4a. [NeX] was a clan that really appealed to me, having highly talented players in lower leagues, and all of them had a sense of humor. I also saw the True Life: TFC Players videos and found them quite funny, adding to my desire to join NeX. I was tried out by Enough on Openfire_l. I completely raped him without trying and he said, ?Well you?ll be able to hold your own in 4a? and chimp commented for spec, ?And 3a, and 2a?. [NeX] became my home and I enjoyed many matches with them. Practice in the lower leagues allowed me to build up my skill in classes other than Medic. I was soon a well-rounded player, preferring Medic on offense and Soldier on defense. For some reason I wanted to leave [NeX] for the return of Xi because Doc the cock-tease woo?d me with his charm. I soon realized he was just a gay Viking and I returned to [NeX]. I was in a co-leader position and caused some people to quit. When we were forced to move up the leagues the game lost its fun for us because nobody was getting along so we broke up. I took another long TFC break and returned to join clan [AFM]. I played soldier for them, even though it wasn?t my best class, and played against clans like Vindicate and TDA. I joined the guild `m3 with relative ease, but after another LONG TFC break, I returned to their disbandment. I came back for the remaking of [NeX], and now after a few matches and an accusation of aimbot on my by FainRaven, we?re coming off the win against [BD] tonight. I?m sure I missed a ton of stuff but this will just have to do. LISTEN TO HOW WIERD THIS IS! I missed my basketball game because I was sick and wanted to make the match, but I missed the match because I fell asleep from being tired from the sickness. OH THE BITTER IRONY! SO NOW WE BEAT BD AND CHIMP IS GONNA RAPE KARNAGE AT WRITEUPING! CHIMP IS GONNA TAKE THE WRITEUPING WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS IN PARIS, FRANCE THIS YEAR!
kaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY


Ok, now for a short version of mine. I got interested in tfc from my real life friend SHAWN ([DO]-AG). I went to his house, he showed me the video "skillout" I WAS LIKE WOW< THAT VIDEO GAME IS ELITE NUBER UBER DUDER. I used to play tfc before cs. I was the badlands sniper. I played on my pos computer. I played cs, and used to say, TFC IS NOOB YOU NOOB. So then, i got into it. I was amazing, i touched the mouse, and i started at this level, NOT. I started in corkys clan. AG told me about his clan winning by 200 in OGL. so i joined it. My first match on sd2. I had no idea what i was doing. Soo after that, that clan died. And i joined NEX, with racer and pez. Racer was leading, PEZ made the name. I joined as co-leader. So i wanted to get good. So i played nonstop in phatfarm, BAM -emeril im amazing. Playing in those servers make you good. I got amazing. I learned how to prime nades it was amazing. After that, NeX was doing good. We started playing top clans in OGL, like AGT, |{, and Zt. We lost to AGT, 2sM, and |{. We played |{ on ofire and mulch_trench, we didnt even try. This was AMAZING |{, with reptile bats soldier, killing all our O before we got in base. SO we lose like 500-0 on ofire, we didnt try. We play mulch_trench and cap like 3 times, we lose 48353-30. We just played, we get in irc, racer is like, "you guys win", "no we lost by like 1k" he goes iNSANE< HE IS LIKE, IM EMBARASSED TO LEAD THIS CLAN, YOU GUYS ARE HORRIBLE, i hear in my ear "SNAP, BOOM, BLAM" Racer, bad move. I go insane. I post in our forum:

OMG GREEN!, I AGREE. RACER, you were fucking pissing the living fuck out of me last night. I was thinking about driving to cali and blowing up your house. Its like you expect us to do really good against a top clan. And US embarrasing YOU!? WTF?!?! I lost the quote, but let me try to quote your PUBLIC comment in our PUBLIC CHANNEL:

"We lost 250-0 on ofire, GJ NEX!" You are in fucking nex, you made us look bad. YOU EMBARRASED YOURSELF. If we played with you, you wouldnt do SHIT. SO dont say anything. YOU HAVE TO WATCH THE DEMOS. THEN YOU WILL UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT WAS. WE PLAYED TO HAVE FUN. NOT TRY TO PLAY AND LOSE BAD AND BE PISSED AFTER THE MATCH.

Are you fucking giving up on NeX!?!? That comment was like someone from the other clan making fun of us. BUT NOOOOO, it was the leader making fun of his own clan. Then of course, to make it even worse. Just send an email to EVERY clan member and rub it in their face. Go ahead racer, try to kill the clan, just try. Well, atleast thats what its looking like. You used to be cool, and you didnt care about us losing. But now you are acting like you are all 1337 for playing in "1337" pubs. So you expect us to win EVERYTHING. We WILL win thursday, i promise you that. I go into ALL those pubs, and im usually the top scorer. So those pubs dont do SHIT. I do worse playing in a dustbowl server. And racer, if you think we are making NeX look bad, you make us look bad too. You are the one in the pubs playing all serious and cussing at the other AWESOME players saying they suck, because they arent playing for real. I.E. When TDA was on bases_r2 and you were the only D, you said "GJ they got a nother cap, WE SUCK". And if you didnt notice, how many people laughed?

BUT ANYWAYS. IM NOT TRYING TO GET YOU PISSED, but you are trying to get us pissed at you. Just change your ways real quick, or this clan is gonna die.

Ahhhh. IM SOOOO FUCKING PISSED AT YOU RACER, YOU WONT BELIEVE. You better respond, and not like last night. DONT FUCKING IGNORE ME. I FUCKING RUN THE CLAN.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Whatever, well i think i said everything. But racer, just change your ways, NOW!

-Chimp

IM FAT

------

SO, he quits NeX. But im cool with racer now, He is the leader of the MLO league, which is INSANE for cs, but tfc is working too well, check em out at #mlo. So yea, our next match, AGAINST Zt. WE ARE LIKE WHOA. We are playing the #1 clan. We practice, i go in their channel "GG Zt." THATS HOW I REMEMBER IT, They died the night we were supposed to play them, obviously scared. So WE ARE #1 IN OGl, with our forfeit win, WOOO over |( and AGT, it was insane. Its goijng good for nex. I recruit ex H2k guys trex, and get DWD enough. We start getting amazing players. Not to mention my bunnyhop sessions to teach current top clanners how to bhop. We've had so many people go through nex and learn. We die and come back and die and come back, and die, and come back. AND HERE WE ARE AGAIN, WOOO BEWAREEEE....



Now funny past logs:

Fs-flixeR- Chimp fucking aimbotted me to death
Fs-flixeR- Chimp fucking aimbotted me


Trust me, I'm not easily impressed..

WOAH!! A blue car!


<NeX|chimp`2xL[TPE]|out> @rq
<NCG_BsBot> <AG-W-> bs you smoke as much weed as chinaso eats rice

<M|-F4i-[GcB`m]> A cheeseburger is like a hamburger...only with cheese. <AG-W-> holy shit that guy is a fucking genious <]Xi[QuicKSilveR-[AD]-> i wish i was that smart

:L (? ? chimp 2002)

Translate this?
<[SS]MxFuRY-[t]> well he prolly drowned out what i was saying
<[SS]MxFuRY-[t]> and i got kills

plant fertilizers, animal feed, and colorants for brick
In living things, manganese is a part of many proteins and enzymes
In human beings and other animals, a lack of manganese disrupts growth and results in disorders of the bones and central nervous system. A diet that includes beans, nuts, green leafy vegetables, or whole grain and cereals provides adequate amounts of manganese.
All steel has some manganese
Applications include dry cell batteries, paints and dyes, and photographic developer

Take the weapon you want to dupe, put it in the cube, put the cow level in the cube, enter the cube, enter the cow level inside the cube, make a tp, throw 45 javelins at a cow, go to town, talk to cain for 3 hours, put cain in the cube, talk to cain again, go to cow level, talk the cow king into crawling into the cube, take out the weapon you want to dupe, put it back in, take it back out, put it back in, look up, if the sun shines, and cain is walking on a rainbow, holding hands with the cow king, your item has been duped, and the duped item has been placed in a random game on another realm, VOILA!
If not, try again!

YOU HAVE DUPED


<[NeX]chimp> Chimp - 182786
<[NeX]chimp> lounge lizard - 76337
<[NeX]chimp> NeX]JMAN WONID ---> 1894249
<[NeX]chimp> War|ord666 - 2636949
<[NeX]chimp> pez - 2743178
<[NeX]chimp> jonas - 3803156
<[NeX]chimp> Hellz-angel - 2413533
<[NeX]chimp> NeXr]Velocity^iE's WONID --> 157468
<[NeX]chimp> Kami's Wonid --> 309557 / 3445845
<[NeX]chimp> pr00f- 412530
<[NeX]chimp> <[NeX]Enough> 2183325
<[NeX]chimp> <[NeX]Velocity^iE> 157468
b0b-183599
trex-154315*
corky-515079
webstalker-115668
QuatelHelix-1615420
melchor-457844
moneyyy-68841*
force-2508462/1062130
jayrod-1953852
naka2nd-770753
undertow-1367950
Fu|2y-574025
wizard-2119796
Fuzzy-514628
loco-117743
Mevo-1849672
blue-586008
Fragile-95865
Beast-2021957
b3w-517060
cliche-3293622/4009970
MadEagle-2093118
Traqz-613836
Fiasco-1371487
wong/Vision-2473124/1686052
Mase-144043
supknifed-42737
evil69-80230
Spid-3668971
naka-47023
prodigy-1705620
miyagi-205939
serenade-3104563
Jebus-4009970
web2/eclipse-321322
web3/Verb-60789
co][osus-88924
blurry-3533107
bleed/pancakes-926612
ShaMs-88791
necro-3301431
ag-8629
Ripzone-104711
Pale Ale-411879
distort-4294967295
SkiZzY-1473055
Kirby-114672
Ramero-4081812
Skaird-1716930
spanky-178312


NEX MEMBERS BABY

Ja Rule BABY! Murdahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I N C .
Chaptah TWOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww baby
I WANNA ROCK WIT YOU
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww BABY
YEA YEA YEAIM ALLLLLLLLWAYS ON TIME
AND IVE GOT BIG BLING BLING NIGGA
WUTTtttttttttttttt
MURDAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I
N
C
.

<NeX|Hy-sucks> and and and.....my parents dont like me <NeX|Hy-sucks> and and....i have a ingrown toenail <NeX|Hy-sucks> and...IM RETARDED!!!!!! <NeX|Hy-sucks> WAHHHHHHH <NeX|Hy-sucks> WWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

<Unabomber[FU]> Chimp, you were banned because of repeated sig violations, as well as flames in the STA Silver Prediction forums.
<Unabomber[FU]> A sig may not contain more than 4 lines of text. Your latest one had 7+ lines.
<Unabomber[FU]> Chimp, you will be unbanned in a few days.

Yea right, ip banned from cats

<uC|CoLTranE> i got a question
<uC|CoLTranE> why the fuckin are you guys in tfl4a?
<uC|CoLTranE> well you guys just pwnd a sta silver team

<uC|CoLTranE> whoever money was
<uC|CoLTranE> fucking raped me

cRaZeH insOmniac: it says "it BECAUSE HE FELL ASLEEP"
cRaZeH insOmniac: make it say missed match because or w/e
cRaZeH insOmniac: lol
cRaZeH insOmniac: how fast did he finish his writeup?
cRaZeH insOmniac: lol
cRaZeH insOmniac: damnit I was gonna sing "My Girl" to sunshine in prematch BUT I COULDNT PLAY BECAUSE MY FUCKING THROAT IS SWOLEN AND IT CUT OFF THE OXYGEN TO MY BRAIN AND I PASSED OUT AND SHIT FUCKIN SUCKS


Beezlechubby tried to delete our last week writeup, HAHAHA NOPE CHUBBY.

<ChanServ> [[NeX]Abyss^cool] [22:13] * madeagle has joined #nexpriv [22:20] <Force> GAY EAGLE [22:20] <Force> came out of retirement [22:20] <Force> TAG UP [22:20] <[NeX]Link> tag up force =). ||| [20:42] <[NeX]chimp> watch this vid [20:42] <[NeX]chimp> my dog playing with his monkey [20:43] <[NeX]Enough> link? [20:44] <[NeX]Abyss^m8> Enough is interested with dog masturbation I see

WOO GG, I BETTER WIN.

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