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nLv over HOP

After a good while, we got teamed up to play HOP this week. Our last runin with them was a massacre on 2mesa3, although dre pointed out we played short. Regardless, it was a fun match, and they were a great group to play against.

This weeks make was raiden... to the best of my knowledge none of us had ever played it before, and we had a pretty mediocre practice for about 15-20 minutes before matchtime. shakezula, who decided to vanish and not play, came up with our strat, and it worked out pretty well for us.

Round 1
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On our server the pings suck, but the drinks and titties are free, so it wasn't a total loss. It's an all out D-fest on both sides of the map, but nLv seems to be making the most progress, getting some touches here and tehre, but nothing of much substance on either end. Our new popsicle, Nine Host was doing some major damage on SG detail, while the rest of us (primarily tempest) held a fencing competition in our respawn... using our penises.

nLv makes the first real pull and it just so happens to be a coast-to-coaster by yours truly! As I gleefully HOPped my way back to our cap, my buzz was cut like foreskin at a bris, when I saw HOP on their way out with a flag of their own.

With things tied up, we go back to the conference room... or as I like to call it... the tie tempest up and insert bamboo chutes into his tear ducts room.

At that point it's basically a D-fest, revived, with both teams making pulls, but none getting the flag out. At this point sid decides that tempest is taking too much of an active role as He who pisses rage off the most and decided that once again, it was his turn to be the bane of my existence. So what does he do? He goes random player class. At that point we're functioning with 3 Offense, while sid does nothing of substance. But what's worse is that we still ahve tempest, essentially leaving us with 2 offense, and I'll give sid a little credit and make him worth half an O. So 2.5 offense, consisting of me, Nine Host, and half of sid (preferably the lower half... tee hee) went at it again.

Finally, somehow, through none of my own doings, we got a pull. Then a touch. Then some more touches, and soon enough it's out in the yard. And go figure, tempest is the one who's bringing it home. And what does he do? He gets crowbarred by a scout. Twice.

So I decide to save him some face from getting it a 3rd time, and cap it myself. In retrospect I should have given it to Nine Host, cuz he probably did all the work.

nLv goes up a cap, and being on offense, I can't say what happened on our D, except that HOP isn't an easy opponent, and they worked one out as well a short while later, tying the round at 2-2.

Rd1 Offense: sid (sorta), tempest (blows), 9h0st (sauce), me (penis)
Rd1 Defense: ied (vagina for penis), equ (anus for penis), ber (mouth for penis), fury (hands for penis), nomad (too good-natured for penis)
Rd1 Score: 20-20 tie!

Round 2
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Sid threatens to leave, so Nomad switches positions with him. furby has to go to be whipped, but that's ok cuz his gf is hot. And Nine Host has to leave mid-round most likely. So we're stuck short at least a player for rd2, when, tada... loserville shows up magically in the server without uttering a word in IRC! Thank god sponge took authority and re-added him to our TFL roster!

So we manage to field 9 for at least part of rd2. Both teams adapt to eachother's O in this round, and make it much harder on both sides to get any pulls. It coudl just be that I was oblivious, but nLv seemed to be making the most pulls - but it hardly mattered, cuz HOP was always returning them on us without much effort.

What does the trick is when Sid puts his tele up on the batts, and we start hitting them up high a lot more. We make an amazing pull and battle a very hard-fought flag out to our capture point. Meanwhile, not wanting anything to do with the tomfoolery in the yard, and being a pacifist, I decide to camp in HOP's FR, basking in the soothing hum of their rotating SG.

Hearing the Your team has the flag noises, I assume we're about to cap, and instead of feigning, decide to try to kill the SG for a quick relay. Alas, I got up right as their engy waltzed back in, and he made quick work of me.

From that point on both teams were in deadlock. Switching to 5 Offense, HOP got close a number of times to tying the round up again. So we did the only thing a 5L streak clan would do... send an extra D. But tempest is mostly just for show... and not much for show, at that. HOP makes a last-ditch effort and pulls a flag pretty close to the outskirts of our base, but seconds are now ticking away on the game clock, and the round ends with them and our flag in our RR.

Rd2 Offense: 9h0st, me, tempest, loserville
Rd2 Defense: ied, equ, ber, sid, nomad
Rd2 Score: 10-0 nLv!

Final
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It's been forever since I've gotten to do a writeup, and now I'm remembering how much I hate to type. Nonetheless, it feels good to get a win under our belts again, finally, and couldn't have asked for a cleaner match.

I think the map shoulda been 8v8, but it played much better than mortality did 9v9. Despite making no progress whatsoever for 90% of the match, I felt like I saw the FR a lot more.

Hearty GG to HOP, and look forward to the tiebreaker some time in the future

Final Score: 30-20 nLv!

On a sadder note, some of our members have succumbed to RL priorities and will be going inactive as of this evening. They may or not include fury, sid, shake and tuan. <3

- |nLv|Mr_Rage`H - /// lemur4

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