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MoC over TDA

We?ve been waiting for this match all whole lives, or since last week. We had recently found out that TDA had lost by a fair amount in ADL. We knew it would be possible to beat them on avanti. However, we knew we would have to play our best. We made it our mission to study every element of the map. We analyzed every possible strategy, spending many sleepless nights studying blueprints of the layout of the map. It put a lot of time and effort prior to this match. Oh and we also recruited some of those ADL players that took down TDA?.

If you have been following correctly, just about everyone in MoC has had a turn being our ?leader of the week.? So, we decided that we would recruit one, Er| Koenig. He took over and told us where to play and stuff even though half of us were completely clueless as to what to do. Hell, I didn?t even know it was 8v8 and shit, TDA didn?t even know what config they were suppose to have.

So we begin? TDA has their usual roster of ?change your fucking names we don?t know who you are.? We decided to surprise TDA with a little present. No, it wasn?t Syphon?s mom (that wouldn?t be a surprise obviously), it was none other than the cheater himself, ch! Man, you should have been there when they saw him join the server. They just about shitted themselves. On top of that we decided to play ?Mr. VAC Banned,? fatal. After that, Phish unexpectedly dropped from the server. We all knew he was rushing to watch hltv with his dual monitors locked on his favorite players?

With 1.5 mins left in pre-match, our fearless leader Kr| Koenig drops. We begin to think that TDA had paid him off to screw us over when we needed him the most. However, he soon returned and we all cheer and applauded his return. I was as if we were on the battlefield of that movie Braveheart. Except we had our pants on, except for royal who was doing his usually pre-match masturbation ritual (he had to relax?). So, TDA gets to be blue first and they slowly cap one after other. When the finally got 4 we thought we had done well. We proceeded to do the same. Then, collision decided he had enough of getting raped as eng, so he left the match to watch the ?best avi ever? for the 10th time. Fortunately, the Drug War Master, Diablo was on hand. To tell you the truth, Diablo didn?t help much (no offense, but you are no syphon). The round ended with TDA up by about 20. We knew than being blue was advantageous and we had a chance of winning round 2.

In irc people were amazingly relaxed. Apparently, I sucked round 1 and was told to play engineer. I kept it real, and told them ?go fuck themselves, I?m not playing engineer you gooks? (that for you 44). So they fine start making the write-up we are going to win. I laughed and thought of a great idea to foil their plans of victory.

So, we knew we needed reinforcements, and the best available player we had was ?Mr. 4 IDs AKA VAC Banned Jr.? 44. I sure TDA was already preparing their dispute. Round 2 starts and I?m on vent. I was amazed by how quickly we got all 4, and even more so by how long we held TDA on 3. About 15 mins were left in the round and they began calling me to prepare the write-up. It was at this moment that I knew I must execute my devious plan. I gave my servant, Void, the information to their vent channel. We then began leaving and join their match channel. It soon became unbearable for them to hear. Those bitches deserved it. No one attempts to make me play engineer and gets away with it. I really didn?t find out what had happen until after the match (I got banned from vent ofcourse).

I found out that we had less than 5 minutes to cap 3 and 4. Being the true nerd that he is, 44 began hyperventilating. Finally, we capped it with under 2 minutes to go. By the time the gates opened, TDA had 1 minute to cap 1 and 2. It was an impossible task. The nerds began rejoicing on vent and annoying everyone with their high pitched screeching voices.

There is so much to say about this tremendous victory, and so many people to thank. So I will begin:

Pyscosack: Thank you for being the greatest leader MoC ever had, and never will have again. Hell you barely even play anymore. You?re always hanging out in vent and talking and stuff. I wish we could kick you out, but you really aren?t in it. Fuck this is confusing; I?m going to need some psychological counseling.

Syphon: Thank you for taking forever to give me your shitty clips for your shitty avi. Thank you for teaching me how to be hated by the entire TFC community. I can only hope that one day I will be as hated as you.

Stridex: Thank you for idolizing me and getting me the pleasure of raping you while you were in |3eer. Thank you for becoming better than me so that I can attempt to get you banned behind your back.

Collision: Thank you for giving me avi clips that were already in other avis. Thank you for being the most annoying person I have ever heard on vent.

Gogeta: Thank you for being the second most annoying person I have ever heard on vent. Thank you for playing when we really needed you even though we really wanted to play shorthanded anyway.

Royal: Thank you for actually making sense these past months. Thank you for uh, well, never talking on vent (is that a compliment?).

Diablo: Thank you for not playing med or scout tonight. Thank you for not eating my dog. Thank you pm?ing me your fucking retard drug wars link every fucking day.

44: Thank you for being the biggest nerd I have ever known. Thank you for being the only person to dislike my avi you gook. Thank you for not playing while you were suspended even though you had purchased a new steam id to do so.

Fatal: Thank you for being better than everyone, even though you aren?t. Thank you for playing for MoC for more than 1 week.

Decap: Thank you for training 44. Thank you for saying that ch hacks even though you are his best friend.

Ch: Thank you for teaching me how to make hacks. Thank you for teaching me how to make nerds excited and waste hours of their time (trying to ban you ofcourse).

Nokio/met: Thank you for wearing the MoC tags, I know how hard it is for you guys. Thank you for sending me your bhop.dll. Thank you for worshiping me as your god while you were in a silver clan I won?t mention here.

Malice: Thank you for all your inappropriate comments about black people and sexual toys. Thank you for allowing us to make fun of you even though you cry yourself to sleep every night.

Crimmy: Thank you for making killab cry, and thank you for crying at 44. Thank you for letting me join your newbie euro clan that fucking pisses me off every time I play with those wankers.

Prime: Thank you for not playing you laggy piece of shit. Thank you for the clienttrace fun.

Morael: Thank you for risking your eyesight to become the best tfc player you could be. Thank you for allowing me to get disputed every time I use your name.

Doggy, Intrikit, Simplicit, killian, and all those other losers who idle in moc?s priv but don?t feel like playing for our 9v9: Fuck you! We don?t need you guys anyways.

g^F: Thank you for helping us realize our true potential, and thank you for your precious adl hacks.

And finally, TDA: Thank you for purposely making it a close game (I know how you guys do it). Unfortunately, you didn?t know how the map was scored and you fucked up. On behalf of MoC, I would like to say thank you for the 1a title and that you can have it back in a couple weeks when we play again or when we lose the inevitable dispute, which ever comes first. GG!

<3 Leg

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